We are fully bootstrapped. Mostly because nobody wants to fund us.

#26 (3.00/5)

Our app does one thing well: crash.

#45 (2.50/5)

We reached a one billion dollars valuation. In Zimbabwean dollars.

#34 (5.00/5)

We pivot so often our product has motion sickness.

#10 (2.00/5)

Our most active user is a bot we forgot to disable.

#42 (2.50/5)

We're building a community of confused users.

#40 (3.00/5)

We spent 3 months on logo, 3 minutes on product.

#39 (5.00/5)

We pivot so often our product has motion sickness.

#53 (2.00/5)

Our mothers don't understand any sentence in our pitch deck. Neither does our team.

#30 (5.00/5)

95% of our valuation comes from our domain name.

#7 (3.00/5)

We do standups to remember who's still here.

#24 (2.33/5)

We have a unicorn valuation and hamster execution.

#33 (3.00/5)

Our CEO has one superpower. LinkedIn posts.

#16 (2.50/5)

We're in pre-pivot stealth beta alpha.

#41 (3.50/5)

We have more decks than users.

#13 (2.00/5)

We A/B tested our landing page. Both versions failed.

#54 (4.00/5)

We're D2C: Desperate to Convert.

#37 (1.50/5)

We raised a pre-seed round. We now have enough funds to build our pitch deck for the seed round

#14 (2.00/5)

We were profitable once — in a simulation.

#43 (2.50/5)

Our users loved the product… until they realized it wasn’t free.

#61 (4.00/5)

Startup Life

Startup life is hard. Let's laugh about it while we still have some runway.

Standing Desk
Standing Desk
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Mechanical Keyboard
Mechanical Keyboard
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