We pivot so often our product has motion sickness.

We have one strikingly growing KPI. Our churn rate.

Our users loved the product… until they realized it wasn’t free.

We reached a one billion dollars valuation. In Zimbabwean dollars.

We were cashflow positive until someone asked what that meant.

Our product solves a problem no one has, at a price no one can afford.

We're building a community of confused users.

Our go-to-market strategy is hope. And prayers.

We pivot so often our product has motion sickness.

We have an amazing retention. We removed the unsubscribe button.

We pivoted so much our AI startup became a lemonade stand.

We pivoted so much that we developed the same product twice.

After many months of hard work, we finally reached product-market confusion.

We have more decks than users.

We have 14 daily users. And 20 employees...

Our MRR stands for 'Mostly Rhetorical Revenue'.

We pivot so often our GPS gave up.

We have 51 microservices, 10 database, 3 domain names. And 2 users.

Our business plan is just 'AI' written 37 times.

We spent all our pre-seed on hoodies.