We reached a hockey stick growth. Of our AWS costs.

We pivot so often our product has motion sickness.

Our app does one thing well: crash.

We're in pre-pivot stealth beta alpha.

We're agile, mostly in our ability to find new excuses.

We got an acquisition offer! For our domain name.

We pivot so often our product has motion sickness.

We have more funding rounds than customers.

Our founder thinks JavaScript is a coffee order.

We pivoted so much our AI startup became a lemonade stand.

We pivoted so much that we developed the same product twice.

We reached a one billion dollars valuation. In Zimbabwean dollars.

Our MRR stands for 'Mostly Rhetorical Revenue'.

Our exit strategy is getting acquired for our office chairs.

We outsource everything. Particularly, accountability.

We pitched to 50 VCs. 52 said no.

Our product solves a problem no one has, at a price no one can afford.

Our roadmap is a series of panic attacks with deadlines.

We are fully bootstrapped. Mostly because nobody wants to fund us.

We pivot so often our GPS gave up.