Our exit strategy is getting acquired for our office chairs.

We’re not in stealth mode, just too behind to be seen.

95% of our valuation comes from our domain name.

We pivot so often our product has motion sickness.

We have more funding rounds than customers.

Our unique selling point is our creative use of Powerpoint effects.

We have more decks than users.

Our founder thinks JavaScript is a coffee order.

We have 51 microservices, 10 database, 3 domain names. And 2 users.

We pivoted from a failed startup into a podcast about it.

Our mothers don't understand any sentence in our pitch deck. Neither does our team.

We are fully bootstrapped. Mostly because nobody wants to fund us.

After many months of hard work, we finally reached product-market confusion.

We pivoted so much our AI startup became a lemonade stand.

Our growth hack was changing fonts and praying.

We're in pre-pivot stealth beta alpha.

We're D2C: Desperate to Convert.

Our users loved the product… until they realized it wasn’t free.

We raised a seed round. Now we can afford chairs.

We pivoted so much that we developed the same product twice.