Our founder thinks JavaScript is a coffee order.

Our CEO has one superpower. LinkedIn posts.

We pivoted so much that we developed the same product twice.

After many months of hard work, we finally reached product-market confusion.

We're agile: we run in circles, fast.

We have an amazing retention. We removed the unsubscribe button.

We spent 3 months on logo, 3 minutes on product.

We're agile, mostly in our ability to find new excuses.

Our north star KPI is the percentage of buzzwords in our pitch deck.

Our users loved the product… until they realized it wasn’t free.

We're building a community of confused users.

We raised a pre-seed round. We now have enough funds to build our pitch deck for the seed round

We were cashflow positive until someone asked what that meant.

Our tech debt is so big it now has interests.

We don’t have users, we have survivors.

We found the perfect product-market fit. Our product is inexistent, and so is our market.

Our go-to-market strategy is hope. And prayers.

We pivot so often our product has motion sickness.

We have a unicorn valuation and hamster execution.

95% of our valuation comes from our domain name.